Being able to create art is one of the single most important things to me in this life. It fills me with so much satisfaction and joy to complete a project, draw a doodle, make a tune.

My passion for art never left, but for a while now, Ive been finding it incredibly hard to find the motivation or ability to create at all.

Even though I'm still struggling with this, I am in a better spot now than where I was before.. And In this blog, I want to talk about how im pushing past this art block and how it started in the first place.

Extreme Fucking burnout -

As of writing this, Carefroll has been my biggest project ever, and it took alot more than motivation to "complete". Ever since, Ive been struggling to make anything anymore.

Initially I assumed that I just needed a good break after working for so long. But when the time came too soon when I craved making something again, I couldnt find that same creativity that was present for Carefroll...

I was very conflicted; I knew I was capable of making amazing things, but for some reason I just couldnt anymore. I felt very guilty because instead of making cool things, my time was now being wasted just playing games and watching shows.

And to clarify, theres nothing wrong with playing games or watching shows, the only thing wrong here was the fact that I FELT like it was always time wasted.

I was officially burnt out for good.

Wanting to be great -

I always had this idea stuck in my mind that I needed to make Great things, if my next project wasnt better / more impressive than my last, then whats even the point. This stress I put on myself is whats stopping me from enjoying what I used too. This idea was always present and constantly there whenever I did anything creative, and I only realized its presence as of recently.

I think this idea of being great stemmed from twitter, and wanting to consistently post art for a stream of likes and dopamine. I started drawing and doing creative stuff JUST for the purpose of posting it and nothing else. This sucked the fun out of art, and switched my mindset from "What do I want to do" to "What will be best to post". This is also why I felt like playing games or watching shows feel like time wasted, my art isnt gonna get better on its own.

I can look back at this period of my life now knowing my break was necessary to recover from all of this. It give me time to think about what im doing and why im doing it. I could have saved myself alot of mental agony if I had just accepted needing a break from the start lol.

It was hard to know how long of a break I needed. Pushing myself to keep making stuff immediately was not the answer, but it was necessary as of recent...

Finding that joy again -

Im not fully over the stress of being great yet, its now manifesting in a completely different way that ill have to talk about in a different blog. But I am making progress regardless and in a much better spot today.

I had to readjust my motives in art back to "What do I just want to do", it takes a conscious effort now. But this conscious effort has been paying off and Ive been finding myself much happier with the stuff Ive been making recently. It does take more effort and it is more difficult to create art because of me being very rusty now.

But Its fun again

Summary -

Not every project you make needs to be your magnum opus. You dont need to constantly output art like a machine. Focus on what makes you happy, and what you want to create, disregarding the noise of the world. Make art that means something to you, art that you hold dear.

And never quit.

I know all of this is much easier said than done loll, but if you believe in yourself you really can get past anything, and do anythinggg ><

Thank you so much for reading!!! Have a great rest of your day/night and um thanknu! love you! <3